A view into my soul

Let’s get this straight…let’s get straight those facts. I have been in Australia for how long? Twenty-seven months. Is that right? Yep, it is. How long am I going to stay here? Mmm, infinity I guess. Although I thought I might manage all on my own, I figured out that I cannot. As a Leo I can be strong, stronger...independent, more independent...but I cannot manage my life on my own without friends. Oooops, what a discovery. I had thought how well I will manage my new lifestyle with my hubby and his lovely parents. I know how lucky I am to think that way as it shows that we go pretty well. What I did not realise is that friends are unreplacable. A man must have a group of people who can share one's interests with if you want to feel good...possibly to feel like home. I admit I am not living home. Aussie Land is not my home. What it is then? I do not think it is the Czech Land either. Believe or not, I left that lovely homecountry twenty-seven months ago and have not been over there since. Australia, particularly Brisy, is not my home as I do not believe in its culture and did not get used to the lifestyle yet...and I do not have friends here either. It might be...it actually is because I did not open myself and did not invite anyone into my life. I simply believed I can do it on my own with a help of my new relatives. It is possible but not for long. Although you have this soulmate right next to you with similar interests of yours, you need a few your own friends. I suppose I have got the the next step when I became upset at myself for the laziness to step out of my comfort zone and make an effort to really meet some. There is a trouble...how I am going to meet them. Honestly, I do not have a clue! See, I am not the type of person who starts talking to someone walking the same direction, sitting on the same bench, looking at the same piece of clothes in a shop, buying the same cereals... It might sound ridiculous but I will not do so. I can tell myself an excuse such as "I am not so desperate for friends". Trully I am. However, who would like to be a friend with someone crying out of one's lungs 'I want to be your friend'?! Now it is up to me...to engage my butt into a gear and do something about it. Therefore, please wish me luck as I do not know what I am exactly going to do...but it is going to be something because I discovered I need to live a valuable life not just attempt to survive.